Is it too early to move Jay Bruce into Cooperstown?

Let me start this by laying out one fundamental truth: I suck at Fantasy Baseball. I suck in a way that would make the average person say "I will not be playing Fantasy Baseball" next season. I hate Fantasy Baseball. Yet, I continue to play season after season, often finishing in the cellar or at least on the stairs down into the cellar.

That being said, there is one thing keeping me going this year: Cincinnati's Jay Bruce. He has rekindled my love for all things Fantasy Baseball. I'm not gonna sit here and proclaim myself some guru of spotting minor league talent or anything like that. Anyone with two eyes and internet access could see that this kid was legit. Just look at the minor league credentials: .308 BA, .366 OBP, .555 SLG, 108 2B, 20 3B, 61 HR, 245 RBI in 1,341 AB. The guy averaged an extra-base hit once every 7.1 AB. For reference - that number is not that much higher than what Albert Pujols has produced in his major league career (1 XBH every 6.8 AB). It was only a matter of time before Bruce got the call from the Reds, which finally came on Wednesday, May 28.

Now, as a reasonable person (which you obviously are), you might ask what took the Reds so long to call him up. Simply put...they're fucking morons. OK, that wasn't nice and might be slightly biased, but here's what the Reds were trotting out in centerfield before Bruce got the call: Corey Patterson and his .200 BA, .295 OBP, .352 SLG and 4 HR. THAT is what was keeping Jay Bruce down in the minors. Of course, they also could've been holding him down there as a way to play games with the arbitration system (by holding him down for a certain number of days this year, they avoided starting his arby clock and probably prevented him from becoming a "Super 2," which means he would be eligible for arbitration after his second year in the Majors instead of his third based on some permutation of service time and rank among peers with similar service time. Yeah, I don't get it either), but I just prefer to believe they're dumb. I mean, Dusty Baker is their manager, isn't that all the proof you need?

That being said, here's what Bruce has done since he's come up: 11-for-19, 3 2B, 1 HR, 4 RBI, 5 BB, 2 SB, 8 R. His first career home run came Saturday afternoon against Atlanta and was a walk-off home run. He has reached based in 16 of his first 24 plate appearances and it's a strong possibility that he's not actually human. He's also come up early enough that he can make a very strong run at this year's ROY award, similar to Ryan Braun's race with Troy Tulowitzki last season.

Bruce has definitely shown (albeit in a very small sample size) that he is ready for the spotlight and, lest we forget, he's only 21. I think this guy has a very long career ahead of him. I know one thing's for sure: I'm keeping him and his $10 salary for next year's iteration of Costa and the Costettes. Who knows? Maybe next year is the year I finish...ah who am I kidding? I'll finish in last again.